Ain’t No Such Thing As A Slimming Tattoo

Posted: March 31st, 2009 | Author: Dr. Bill | No Comments »

I had to go to California last Thursday for a conference, and just returned home late last night. I heard from a number of very interesting people at the gathering, who spoke on any number of health related topics.

It was great to go to a place where the weather was darn near perfect, 72 degrees, with just a hint of a breeze, and absolutely no humidity. It’s no wonder that they need six lanes of freeway on each side of the road. I didn’t feel much like boarding the plane yesterday afternoon, but here I am.

With the weather that good, you can imagine that shorts and tank tops were the rule, and not the exception, like here. One thing I did notice there was that almost everybody has a tattoo. Walking down one popular street I saw hundreds, maybe thousands of tattoos. And let me tell you, every tattoo artist is not Rembrandt.

In point of fact, some of the tattoos were more Jackson Pollock than Van Gogh (not that there’s anything wrong with Jackson Pollock…on a canvas other than a human body.) The term that I came up with was “bad exterior decorating,” and there was plenty to go around.

But the thing that really got to me was the “heavies” and their tattoos. If you really want folks to know you’re fat, get a tattoo. It’s kinda like announcing your problem to everyone within a hundred yards or so.

Now I also thought of the word “contest” while taking in the sites, and my friend agreed. We started keeping track of some of the more colorful tattoos on our watch, and to make a long story short, we were standing at a corner, in front of a very famous restaurant, and a whale walker rolls by.

Let me explain.

A very large woman, probably going 275+, with one of those mini mutts on a leash, and she had a …WHALE…tattooed on her back.

At which point my friend uttered, “Do you think it makes her look slimmer?”

It took me 10 minutes to recover from that.

And the answer is no, No, NO.

Ain’t no such thing as a slimming tattoo.

But I am certain she wasn’t taking Dr. Bill’s Powerhouse Omega Formula, which would get her started on the road to recovery.

I’m speaking about her health here, because that tattoo is forever, and even with my surgical skills, the only thing to be done there is order a new canvas, which might take several donors.

When you are seriously overweight you are many, many times more likely to develop diseases which can kill you, or cripple you.

Fish oil is a starting point, the foundation of any good health plan. And my Powerhouse Omega Formula is the Mercedes of pharmaceutical grade fish oil. There are others…and then there is Dr. Bill’s Powerhouse Omega Formula.

Just remember to eat right, exercise, and take your fish oil. If you want a tattoo…fine…just keep in mind it doesn’t work like Spanks.

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